Manny Gets Horny in Brisbane

Gotcha!!! But no, it’s not what you think, you green-horned devil, you!!! What I simply meant was that our man, the Honorable Senator, Manny Pacquiao, is going to school this Aussie former schoolteacher, Jeff Horn, in their WBO World Championship bout this Sunday in Suncorp Stadium in what is now acclaimed as the “Battle of Brisbane”, the biggest sporting event Brisbane has ever had.

Jeff Horn sports a 16 win (11 KOs), no-loss, 1 draw record. He is 9 years younger, roughly 8 pounds heavier, and has a 5-inch height advantage. But other than that, Jeff has nothing else to show against the speedier, vastly more-experienced Pacman. This is his once-in-a-lifetime chance to achieve international boxing recognition.

Manny’s 59-6-2 record with 38 KOs is certainly not something one dismisses lightly. It is a record even made more distinct by the quality of the opposition you find in those figures. You see such illustrious names as Floyd Mayweather Jr, Oscar de la Hoya, Shane Mosely, Miguel Cotto, Ricky Hatton, Timothy Bradley Jr, and the Mexicans: Juan Manuel Marquez, Eric Morales and Marco Antonio Barrera; future Boxing Hall of Famers all. Hence, Jeff is not exactly expected to teach our good senator the rudiments of boxing. Rather, it is the boxer in Manny who will teach the teacher a thing or two about the sport.

Expect Manny to finish off the gallant challenger in the middle rounds. It doesn’t matter if Manny hasn’t had a KO in his last couple of fights, this fight is definitely a big mismatch. Jeff’s only chance – a chinaman’s chance – is a fluke swing that he hopes will connect in the same way Juanma Marquez connected in their last bout. Improbable, but not entirely impossible.

People say that this could be one of the last fights in Manny’s illustrious boxing career. Some say that he has lost a step or two, and that he has other bigger concerns right now, having been elected to the Philippine Senate. But I daresay that Manny hasn’t lost his love for the smell of the mitts. It’s been only a few months since he schooled the Mexican Jessie Vargas, and he showed how good he can still be. The speed and power were still dazzling. And Manny still misses the activity, as well as the environment in the gym. He may get tired from the hard workouts, but he still delights in the fan frenzy. And he knows that he can never acquire the same adulation from fans discoursing in the Senate floor as he can by shedding his precious blood, sweat and tears in the ring.

So let’s enjoy Manny while we still can. This time, Manny will not only take the bull by the horn, I expect Manny to bully the Horn. And don’t be surprised if Manny gets Horny in those middle rounds.