to live, to love, to learn, to leave a legacy… and to laugh along the way
Just some episodes in my life that have contributed to who I am today
Little by little, the mountains would humble me with lessons that no staff assignment could teach: that leadership begins with shared hardship, that credibility is earned rather than assigned, and that comfort, if left unchecked, has a quiet way of softening even the most experienced of soldiers. I had returned to command a Scout Ranger Company. I didn’t realize it then, but my Rangers were also slowly – and subtly – teaching their commander how to become one again.
By letting me glimpse the heavy burden behind the stars on his shoulders, he transformed my writing from simply efficient to deeply authentic. I was no longer just ghostwriting official correspondence or crafting strategic speeches; I was learning to articulate the heartbeat of the leader. That was when I found out that good writing isn’t measured by eloquence. It is measured by authenticity.
What began as a simple transfer for the sake of family placed me in a unique position to witness – up close and personal – the tension, the uncertainty, the courage, and the hope that unfolded during the historic EDSA People Power Revolution of 1986. It was a moment when history ceased to be something found in books and became something we lived through, those fateful days that would not only be the country’s pride, but would be a model for many more countries in the years that followed.
I had barely been introduced when she looked at me and asked, almost matter-of-factly: “Sundalo ka pala? Ilan na ang napatay mo?” (So you’re a soldier? So, how many men have you killed?”) For a second, I didn’t know how to react. I didn’t know whether to laugh or to take it seriously and defend myself.
Life has taught me that growing older is not necessarily about abandoning ideals. It is about learning that truth rarely belongs entirely to one side. The fire of youth seeks to change the world overnight; maturity and the mellowing of years understand that conflicts are infinitely more complicated. I no longer see the world through the rigid lens of left or right. Time, experience, loss, and service have softened my perceptions. In the end, perhaps growing up is not about surrendering convictions, but learning to carry them with balance, wisdom and the humility to see humanity even in those we may have once called the enemy.
The experiences I gathered taught me that war is not composed solely of heroic battles, dramatic victories, or thrilling near-death escapes that we see in the movies. It is also made up of empty seats at family tables. Of birthdays spent far from home. Of children who know their fathers only through photographs. Of friendships ended abruptly by a burst of gunfire. Of brave men making decisions that unknowingly become their last.
